Questions Without Answers

Every journey begins with a burning question. This may be the simple curiosity of discovery which seeks a new horizon to explore or it may take a more specific form. In some cases the question is so profound that it forces one to take on the journey. This is the kind of journey and experience that happens to many people when they begin to ask themselves who they are and where they have come from. For some people they look back on the experiences of their life and they find it sufficient to explain the way they see themselves. Others seek areas of self which seem to transcend the life as it is currently known, to pursue the unknown within and without themselves.

To those who look and see the answers to their questions I have but little to offer. In my case the experience I have to offer is that of burning questions unanswered and which seem exhaustive in the effort to pursue. It is these questions which drive me ever onward.

What is the true nature of my own self?

What existence is my own existence based on?

What is beneath the self?

Who am I?

Eventually the answers become as exhaustive as the questions, seemingly without end. There is a continuous looping process whereby with each degree of realization of the self that I am aware of there is a new self that I have yet to know. In that the engine of questions is fed by the fuel of answers.

Yet, as the same questions burn and eat more answers, the direction of the question becomes more apparent. The question of self becomes refined. There is no longer an answer of identity, but of qualities. The self no longer identified by a question but instead becomes an answer.

I am that I am.

This statement both answers the question and is the question. The quality of being is the foundation of the self. This is presence, existence in its rawest form. It is the truth that IS. This statement is an ideological seed which describes the root of self-awareness within the mind. It is from this that the self-identified Nous is projected. This fundamental being can be likened to a great potential. It is the wound spring which is at the heart of all life. This truth transcends the statement.

Once you begin to realize that you are not the limited qualities which make up your personality nor the details of the mind and intellect you are pressed to further explore in to the recesses of your consciousness. In this you begin to wade through all of the facets of the self which make up the inner and outer appearance which act as a garment for the pure, unfiltered self within. The pure presence of being.

That being which is at the center of your existence is slowly de-cluttered and the contents of the mind expand, growing space between them. As more space opens the pure state of being is seen in the mind, always present as a background to the great galaxies of thought. Slowly it is seen that the self which was before full of so many qualities is in truth empty and thus limitless in its potentials. The self which was before seen as individualistic and narrow is now collective and universal. The qualities are no longer seen as possessed but rather held in potential, to be spurned by the right stimulation from the self.

As the self expands and becomes empty, indeed seemingly as no longer a self at all but merely a pulsating presence which permeates all things, there is a peace which begins to settle. This arises from an awareness of the continuity of the self and the temporal nature of the personality and its qualities. No longer is there a need to maintain a particular sense of self. No longer is identity striven for but instead it is allowed to arise naturally in whatever form it takes.

The Will becomes alive then. It is no longer a force behind life but rather it is known to be Life itself. The Will is no longer seen to be something which is spurned by the individual existence but rather the individual existence is spurned by the Will. The Will is the activity that is sparked from the being. It is being in action. Potential becoming kinetic. Being and Will are two parts of one flame.

To grow the heat of Will without tapping the potential of Being is to invite immolation. To tap the potential of Being without growing the heat of the Will is to invite stagnation.

The Will is not the same as desire. Desire calls to the Will. It is an element of the personality and the mind and emotions. Desire is part of the content which clutters the Being and dilutes the Will. Desire is that which needs to be organized in order for the Being to enact its Will for it describes the pathway that Will takes in the enactment of Being.

Thus, the journey begins with a question and in every question is a desire. To desire temporal things, simple comforts and pleasures, will see your Being enacted through a Will which will always seek further answers in the same places. The personality is a structure of desires. To refine that desire, to desire those lofty ideals of the eternal soul which are represented by decency, compassion and peace is to begin to refine the question of the self towards an ongoing elevation in answer. Eventually, the question and the answer become the same thing. That which you are and that which you do become One. The question of self becomes its own answer. The act of living becomes the answer to the question of the purpose of life. There is no greater purpose in living than to be alive but this in and of itself is the greatest purpose there is.

The Will of Life is to enact its Being through desire. The Being which desires to know itself comes to know the Will of Life. The Being which knows the Will of Life desires for the Will of Life to be enacted. That which is becomes that which it is.

Turn ye the personality towards the knowing of the true self and the Will of the Being of Life that you ARE will gradually become sensed and known. Know thyself and begin to know Life itself, for ye are One.

אֶהְיֶה אֲשֶׁר אֶהְיֶה

IP